What do you do when you would like to utilize the excuse that you’re in way over your head but God has taken down a road specifically so that you cannot use that excuse at this time? Look I know fully well my inadequacies of talent, form, style and looks, but if those were what He needed for me to bring glory to His name in this platform then I assure you that is what I would have received. I know I am not the worst of sinners but I am up there and look upon Grace each day in amazement. There is no story like that of God’s Love through Christ. I don’t know your talents as writer, scientist or theologian, but having travelled all three circles extensively I will tell you no one in any discipline claims to have a greater tale.

I have no excuse for my own misgivings, for my misuse of God’s Gifts or authority and I certainly cannot attempt to use the “I didn’t know clause” because folks I did. My issue is this that I am not where He wants me and certainly no where near my own expectation of my growth, maturity and indwelt usage of the Holy Spirit. I am a source of constant dissatisfaction when I allow myself to review this show as it reflects upon my inadequacy or performance. The unique thing about serving the Kingdom is you may no longer judge yourself. Certainly each of us may reflect upon our shortcomings and go before God in contrition acknowledging the need for forgiveness, cleansing and reform, but we have forgone the position of judge even of our selves. There is only one worthy to open the scroll and to disburse judgment.

Yes, I could have done better. Yes, You may have done a much better job of sharing the word, sharing the song, writing that work or counseling someone through their troubles and perhaps you still may in your own ministry. This is the one I have been given as my field of work, to plant, tend, cultivate and prayerfully wait upon a harvest that I hope is pleasing to the King. I look for Unity in Grace where He has shared His Glory in this Body and I pray for ready Christians who will not shirk the responsibility or opportunity to welcome the master even if He returns at night. I love with all the love that God continues to give me and have seen so many people grow in leaps and bounds as God’s urgency compels us to be ready. What a joy to serve in whatever capacity, even you as self assigned critic believe perhaps that you could have done a much better job. But again this is my cross, my pack to carry up the Hill that I must climb and though I must give some attention to your commentary, it really does not matter all that much. Not to dismiss you but please go do what He told you to do and I am 100 percent willing to bet it wasn’t to fuss with me about my performance.