The ropes creek with the wet seas, bidding them stick and stay cleated to land. The mooring hums eager for the launch; do dry and dream of new birth. Well fell with yonder star that the ocean is now calling, pleading lose love, drop sword and come away with me.

To plunder eternity and break fast with history. Calculating the cost as elders, young men’s heart bid us run, jump and sail away past reason. We do hurt but for necessity and time. The time to read maps in navigation and beat the season’s storm beyond tomorrow’s bridge

So faithful the chin to endure polite calling. Forgetting all the promises we never thought to make and briefly wish we had. Our hearts leap for willful folly, glory and promise of land and riches. For we have seen the excitement of journey’s made by younger men flashing in our eyes.

Would that you hankered for the wind and sea, but it is the land, the land of the many days of tomorrow that draws your gaze. What of tomorrow when today is yet half folded linen leading to potential ends we knew not had begun. My fantasy is the sea spray of today.

Good to have remembered the sweet, velvet blossoms of springs kindness and comradery. To hold the warm hand and hold someone close and quiet for moments, not for tears but smiles in honest reflection of love and family projected upon the tapestry of life.

But reliance upon these things, not being capital crime go without punishment unless one considers absent divine accomplishment and faith without which it is impossible to please Him. I am luring myself to the snares threatening my achievement of purpose.

The question evolves surrounding how these things are achievable through symbiosis? Well it must be done as the rules of the gospel direct. There are so many of us experiencing snags trying to combine worldly with spiritual which will always produce painful results.

I resist and forgive any and all attempts to bully, cajole or manipulate this Pastor, Brother, Friend and Patriot in an published/unwritten narrative position. My sole purpose is loving service to God and His commands upon my: gifts, person, prayer, purpose, potential and execution. Do not expect my ignorance as foothold for any friendly or enemy advances to obtain those outcomes or objectives. You will be met with a lovingly stern resolve to see all of your misguided approaches quashed and deterred.

Preferably I will take several steps back allowing time and meditation to promote forgiveness, thought and wisdom to prevail. But inevitably it will be under your own consideration and choice to react to my confrontation which should be anticipated should attempts reoccur. It is not that I do not care for the opposite is truth, however you must not continue in this regard for the least you should expect is strict admonishment. I pray for God’s Greatest outcomes for you in this life and the next, show me the same consideration or choose to move on.

I believe in God’s supremacy. There are actions HE commands, enables and those HE restricts. I renew my commitment to honor those guidelines, surrendering my own willful sovereignty for HIS. I am not servant to life wounds, emotions or daydreams. The things that I have and seek are in His Word if you find your requests, demands, expectations or wishes to be inconsistent with His Word then the Problem you have with HIM will be the same you have with me, His Servant. I am not here to be pushed around by either your or my own weaknesses for in my weakness I find the Lord’s Strength.

In this ministry I have been patient, choosing to wait before establishing my mettle against encroachments upon my framework. That patience must be led by the Holy Spirit’s direction the word I am receiving from HIM is that patience comes with amenable mirrored demonstration of growth, attempt and His discernment of your heart, mind and intentions. Remember He lives in each of our hearts and the Sword of the Spirit of His Word is Truth’s indication of those things which remain concealed. God knows each of us and will not leave manipulation or false intention either purposely or accidentally hidden in the unconscious.

I will entertain suggestion but remember if you don’t want a Pastor’s help then don’t ask the Pastor for that help. Repeated demand to play by your rules in conduction of this ministry are inconsistent with the growth and accountability that I owe to God in shepherding His Flock. I am not a Savior, Doctor, Psychiatrist, Debate partner or your enemy. I am a Pastor, Preacher, Teacher and Evangelist, a Friend and Brother to those seeking Jesus. If you are seeking someone to manipulate into tolerating any illness or self destructive behavior you are absolutely mistaken. What you are seeking is worldly resolution when I am committed to miraculous intervention beyond my own human capacity. In Jesus’ Name.

Assuming new orbit around the beloved center of the Universe. Locked from rotation upon my own axis, tidally facing the light of my reflection. Showing the darkness my backside, not from disrespect but from knowledge that there is no threat, fear or worry from loss.

What is the flower in budding but becoming the blueprint of its creation lasting each day until that moment of purposeful fulfillment of blossom and seed? To be viewed in the context of that making having achieved the programming of God one day to look upon it.

There had to be a fall, a seemingly insurmountable collection of laws, rules and performance objective over which we were led, thrown or catapulted to new lands and possibility. The documentation of life well lived may not by reason be in simple gifting accomplishment.

Resurrection as a fallen church yet sprouted from new ground, sweet, young, accepting of Celestial seasoning to flourish in technical supremacy of coding upon brand new strands and tether. Born again to a reprized or golden set of memories, targets and experiments.

Watching as time takes on new meaning and purpose no longer held to the temporary clicks of seconds seeking years. Watching horizons with ten billion new hues expanded by complex division of the wonder within light, waiting to adapt or notice shimmers and shadow.

Laying down the life I was meant to live incorrectly. For this road leads to the known destination in the scripting by mankind’s play-writes. Now I crave a destiny that includes the pathway lit up by the stars of understanding. Taking rightful place among them as eternal servant.

Nothing to tell no one to blame, in quest for all things including the fame. Shot for the stars when kneeling prescribed, stolen some hearts and others I bribed. Stepped in deep holes I dug on my own, shredded the rules the good deeds that I’ve blown. Ran away when fighting was right chose to fight when peace would have been right. Shook in my boots no courage was found ran up on the rocks lured in by the sound. Hopeless at best and at worst simply wrong. Wrote a prayer and a song that she said was too long.

When learning was apt was apt to charge in believing chastisement to let the learning begin. Far away wisdom a shelf up to high, stealthily stealing what I most certainly could buy. Begged, clipped and borrowed the pats on the back instead of just asking I had chosen to hack. Knitting a tapestry with holes at each end breaking their hearts without letting them mend. It was all so simple when checking my list eschewing my purpose in not too exist. Leaving them hanging one claw in the curtain abandoned for sure left alone to be certain.

Pray what is done is the best for all involved. The problems, solutions and issues resolved. The thinking the challenge the charge to be known, not remembered in failure or the bad seeds that I’ve sown. In blossoms and carrots and fruits of the ground may my character and courage finally be found. The sound of the wind no longer whispers a name nor the works of relation some rules to a game. Finding successes in the hearts that I meet the errors of judgment twice not repeat. Replete with good measure and some spices thrown in the taste of good pleasure minus my sin.

Many the road and pleasant the task working for wonder for miracle I ask. Not for my wealth, health or wanton heart but to repair that which is broken no longer apart. Formless and fickle the lusts of this man leaving behind this has always been plan. Would that I wanted and wish that at start was not absent reason and greater understanding of heart. Still in this venue I will plant a tree in the end you will see Him in the fruits that shall be. All splendor and graces pour out through your life whether walking in silence with husband or wife.

I leave you with little it is all that I have the wounds they need healing as eye for the salve. So succor your feelings and let God do His work and forgive those that hurt you especially this jerk. The gifts I was given regardless of muse are only worth having when put to good use. In sadness or badness I lose what’s inside perhaps that is the reason my wound is so wide. Empty beginnings and fine fuller ends the intention we mention, the breaks and the bends. It is not what I suffer that makes me the man nor the breadth of successes that says I am part of the plan. Each breath I deliver each beat of my heart defines my position, hope and my part.

My report, I did my best and still fell short. Reaching down to pick up my flag I slapped on my thigh. Counting the dandelions and clovers I hung my head and waited for the sigh.

Never will amount to the bundle of expectations written in the unfulfilled and unpleasant moments of lives with which in some manner I had psychological attachment.

Should my sadness at not having the power of the Savior be enough to chase me from repetition. The calculus just doesn’t produce worthy sum. Always leads to disaster.

How many times may a young man come up shy of super human to remove the curse of trying to be or become something that was never real. What is the quest to be that person?

The failed experiment ought not run one moment of based thinking. Yet, for so many years I and so many others apply all that they’ve got to forestall something outside of reason.

They call claiming they wanted to help me, when my gut immediately determines that they are in trouble that they perceive I may rid them in the false claim of purposeful singularity.

In seniority I have made the decision to sacrifice my own heart for the reasons that God sent me. This has never been about a realization of my own dreams but His Will that they follow.

Tending the flock or field never determines the outcome. Seeding, weeding, feeding and even pruning simply maintain the soul effects of God upon the fruit and or the bounty.

If I rejoice it is neither in absence of success or fear of failure. I rejoice in the election, the appointment as gardener, shepherd or husbandman, a perfect helper for the King.

In God’s imperial armour I stand in Faith and absolute Courage rooted in the Promises of Covenant Vow. Be Gone, shadows of dark dominion, May the Lord choose this moment to send you forever to Fiery Lake’s of eternal separation and regret.

Be still thy mocking mouth of vile curse, spell and whisper. The sound of serpent’s voice. I stand not in carnal expression of sword arm, bullet or human rebuke, but in the Word of God who IS for everlasting the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.

Come to Earth, not for simple joy or the pleasure of Mammon inclusion but legal and prophetic fulfillment in freeing the world from its own vile sin and the debt that we could nevr hope to pay. That promise is the power that through faith diverts fiery darts.

Bring back the understanding and Gospel promise of hope that has been lost in reshaped ritual. Take away the gaping maw of depression and damnation, for Jesus’ life was not expended to lose something that precious to our Creator.

Come off the fence of foolish dedication to wait for victor in sides choosing, the Lord has Won. There is no fence but the one from which you will be called to judgment and assigned place in Gehennah upon your works written in the Books opened at White Throne.

We rejoice not in day of presents, food and grace of human effort but the memory and present/future delight given by God to all creation in choice. This day reminds me that many will choose against God and find painful exile as their reward.

We are the Children of obedience, the First Fruits found faithful when looking at that righteous moment Christ bought us back from slavery and damnation. May this be another moment of my faithful reliance upon His Love, Promise and Provision. In Jesus’ Name.

Moments, these, brought in riding upon the breeze. Head aloft, prepared for the road and what rides upon it. Downhills, unnecessary as momentum draws toward the summit.

To plummet in falls beyond measure. Born of sweet things and challenge remembered. The Pleasure not found in lazy pasture or sunburned stream of the dreams that lure.

Frequently forgotten and waiting, debating the farm or a city. No pity given nor answered divorced. No vows loosely given propagating remorse. Unseated, defeated a top of my horse.

Crimes are not passion raging hearts missing hope. The feelings are master, the leader and scope. The slope above one no longer a fraction, the danger noted in amplitude of reaction.

Thank you’s offered as words were not needed. The forest is cleared and the desert is seeded. Bled free of folly inspecting new reason, devoid of excuses in start of new season.

What outlook division while building new hills my heart less useful in paying the bills. Will’s and God’s Plan what I cannot capture in can.This journey not finished by the hand of a man.

Give to the world what it desperately needs as a handful of grass or the horse that it feeds. No solutions found in questions not asked. Purposes sought in opportunities tasked.

Keep close to light and live in the day, the night is not found on our knees as we pray. To say that I’ve learned is absent the truth, youth spent in the quest on the things I forsooth.

Seek ye first to understand then to be understood, says God’s Word. Following Prayer of course Listening is always the hardest and equally most important tool of ministry. I am therefore attempting, perhaps at last or the last such attempt to understand something currently beyond the grasp of my reckoning.

After repeated attempts to build a foundation it all fell to disrepair. Whatever the driving force it was clearly and immediately abandoned, including a destruction of reputation by sniping and word smearing that effectuated an ending. Though methods of repair were considered the concrete message was received and fully obeyed.

Pastor’s are especially susceptible and aware of the dangers of enemy assault, infiltration or mistaken love, affection or friendship not simply for personal preservation but in protection of the flock associated with anointing. This one came with chastisement that could only have been ignored at loss of everything.

The message had been declared and honored leaving the opportunity for rebirth, healing and renewed understanding or pathways/options. Yet at the last moment having chosen the new unencumbered skinny path an appeal was made presenting evidence and emotional reasoning to ignore the obvious.

This delay produced great moments of self reflection. Were this Pastor’s position based on the failed prison of emotional expectation or rooted in true growth and response to Holy Spirit conviction and guidance? The return of health and dedication to Godly purpose revealed a renewed set of Divine providence.

Again, absent any commitment of Godly resolve and repeated calls to honor such commitment or move on the only response was, “I am not in a place to deliver that shared commitment toward God’s Will”. To me, that was the moment of my righteous anger feeling like a human ball of yarn with which feline leanings determined was an appropriate play thing.

Having honorably, though no longer gently received the same clear message repeatedly a severing of dialogue and any aspiration for repair was logical. I cannot make another person’s mind up for them and may only wait and see until such time as clarity of judgment demands a certain response based on logic not emotion or hope.

So, I emphatically and patiently have been directed by God to listen as is His Will for this man. I have no further words until such time as I have fully understood the seeming insanity of this line of continued/renewed effort. As I have been told that I am the impetus for all your sadness and incapable of producing Godly results then barring such special revelation by appeal or God’s Counsel, it is the Godly thing to forgive and move on to further Divine outlook.

I must ask, why can any person, having pronounced their Pastor, friend or confidante unworthy, continue to pursue them and maintain some relationship or contact considering the past titanium judgments and cruel declaration of inadequacy through betrayal of reputation bashing?

Why can you not let ME go? What is your objective purpose? What is left to be said that has not already been declared? I have no ill intent simply seeking shared Divinely guided health and prosperity in Christian service. If you cannot/will not put it to words then perhaps God will give me guidance by Spirit. I will however try to listen as God’s Word directs.

I seek understanding not fodder/rehash to make decisions that have clearly already been made. I am always willing to provide some clarity or wisdom leading to healing, freedom and re-commitment to Christ and the Voice of Holy Spirit. Choosing to walk away from friends, family is never an easy or simply made decision.

I will deny myself for a short period in hope of providing the missing or sought understanding. Forgiveness has been given, blessings and prayers for continued growth in Christ restored. In the celebration of joy at everlasting life and service in these remaining days I adhere to a return to my First Love. In Jesus’ name.

Though influence based upon words will govern understanding each of us have the freedom to choose our own road and the expectation that those decisions will be honored and respected.

Rebirth doesn’t carry with it the failures, successes or dependencies on previous life. It is impossible to be reborn and hold on to anything of previous objectives, plans or counsel. The Lord granted my prayers of contrition with a statement, “complete Reset”. Why have I been backing off of previous ambitions, commitments, service or belief?

For God to increase I must decrease. Subsequently I have stepped back from all Pastor relationships only serving the flock that needs immediate help and has expressed a Holy Spirit guided direction to remain in this flock. I have returned to the things I did at first in the community, speaking to every person that I meet and praying for all those who express the need and welcome to do so.

This is not a judgment of anyone, merely obedience to the only voice I follow, that of the Holy Spirit. This blog is now in its fifteenth year and was purchased by Google last year, forcing me to take over the URL or have it censored as all the other platforms I support. I wish for those who have been faithful to find local unity in a body of Christ and face to face Pastoral care as Mine is dissolving to once again be a focus on Pastoral Mission service.

The Lord is making it clear that there are very few committed to being in my Family until His Return. If you are one Amen and Amen for the love, loyalty and forgiveness. If you are one of those who remains distant for whatever reason may you be richly blessed by a new song, word or Family to deliver devotion, council or direction as you grow in Service to Christ.

This is not my end but a new beginning. I will find success and brief educating failure in Christ Jesus as I walk in this new life of legacy He directs. As with any of the preaching, teaching, evangelism and whatever other gifts He has given to express, I will leave them to God’s Management, reversal or deletion. I bid you Love and Grace in Jesus name.

No regrets in rebirth or the new path the Lord is revealing before each of us. I love you all and want for you the precise plans of God for your lives and time in everlasting. I cannot write with new life or the words that God is handing me without removing attempts to influence voices or convince people of the past about things of the past. Today forward.

In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ I surrender all those things upon which I have placed hope or continued to cling that are not born of a single commitment; to serve His Will for my Life and that of all others. May everyone find utter peace in the only place it may be found, Jesus Christ the King of Kings.

If I were to, write a song that lit the fires within your heart, spoke a speech worthy of encouraging you to give all to fight or tell a tale that captured your every investment, this would be that day. But I am not a man of crafty ideas, songs that tap feet or clap hands and certainly am devoid of necessary talent to alight the fires of man’s will to overcome. No, none of these things may I bring to bear. Instead I will speak of promises and desires that lay in reason beyond the realms of Earth’s living souls.

If I were to have the set of wide shoulders capable to bearing aloft man’s burden, or legs to carry them to the soft ground beyond rocky shores or the skills of shepherd to protect the flock from dangerous jaws then that day would worthy of remembering. But I am a simple man believing upon the miracles of God born in my prayers for mercy and grace and His Loving promise to provide, protect and use me for some grand purpose beyond my inadequate skills or lack of imagination and thinking.

If I were to be the hero who stood profiled upon the high fields of battle, striking courage as lightning in the hearts of the downtrodden in simple sitting tall upon beast of battle or a trumpeter blasting forth the shrill sound of power and hope as enemy line’s approach then no one would fall pray the spirit of fear to which we succumb before battle’s beginning. But I have no such silhouette to capture folk tale nor the voice of angel to remind people of things worse than the fight that God has brought us.

If I were the oracle sitting alone taking solace in the guaranteed visits of kings and pauper to hear my answers given or the wealthy man having conquered every business or realm in clever manipulation of money, men and assets then I would produce revenue fitting to move men’s hearts and situation to solid ground where they may flourish and remember. But I am no mount of wisdom to which men flock for reason or deep understanding and my only hope is found in the Divine Word or understanding that God’s Holy Spirit has promised to give me at the precise moment of my sanctification before man.