It is hard to say no to anyone regarding something that is within your authority to condone yet outside of the command you’ve been given. The Commandment that demonstrates the Christian understanding was stated by Jesus. Love the Lord your God with all of your heart, mind, soul and strength, as you love no other. The last five words of that commandment are crucial in the process and simplicity of saying NO.

We are saved by Grace. Was Adam? Adam had something that none of us had, a choice to obey God and never experience the wages of Sin. Yes, in grace we may be obedient being born again, then why too do we sin understanding fully the absence of Grace and the price/impact of sin upon us all? Why do we crave regret which is what each of us should feel when we fall from the mercy and grace given? Can we tell no one NO?

Will you tell someone NO when you know that it will cost you your: Land, Job, friendship or loving mate? It was nearly impossible to say NO to Eve the woman of his own rib. Should he have? Of course. The entire path of human history may have been transformed if he had. Not to make it the central question here but do you think he was supposed to give in to her? I mean God’s Plan is clearly based upon the foreknowledge of that failure.

Does it take practice saying NO to people before you can hope to master its effect at one specific important moment? There’s a good question that all of us will answer but will never invite. Is this why Christian men are perceived boring, because they must spend the bulk of their lives telling people NO and subsequently/consequently losing the material, emotional and rewards of this life because they cannot play along with the world to obey God?

That truly is the worldly perspective. For from the new creature, born again mind of a Saint, saying NO is a willingness to lose the carnal but a joyous clarity of the results of accepting the Spiritual. See denial of self doesn’t make you boring if in so doing we achieve things that are outside of our capability/authority unless we say NO to Sinful Opportunities.

The greatest difficulty is that it requires us to do so to those we love and do not wish to hurt as we demand obedience to our First Love, God. You see the greatest problem. Most relationships that are not equally yoked are going to require a constant comparison between the love your; Mate, Friends and Colleagues receive versus God.

However, I cannot tell God NO and simply march on into my own expectations having made that decision. Telling my mate NO may cause Arguments, maybe not many if we are equally in love with God as our First Love, but it may cause conflict. I cannot be disobedient to my Mate as We are not in a Creator, Created relationship.

But most relationships in the modern world come with an unspoken threat of affection/intimacy removal if obedience is not observed. Being in this position for a Christian is the worst type of captivity for there is only One Head of the Church. Only One Sovereign God. Only One Creator and neither of us are Him.

Do I have compassion for those who have to say NO to their mate, their kids, Their Boss? Absolutely, but I also have wisdom enough to recommend that you practice for those times that you will be required to honor God first and disappoint these people in your Life. However the greatest advice I can give is God’s, don’t be unequally yoked with a Non Christian for we do not have the same perspective regarding our first love.

To them there is no one above them and that is a conflict that can be totally avoided in choosing someone born again by God’s Holy Spirit. A person with the same goals, objectives and observance of God’s Commands and Will that resides in your own heart. Is it easy to tell your Mate NO even when you are both Christian? NO, but the fight/explanation of why you are saying NO should rapidly arrive at mutual understanding.

If you do say NO and your mate balks or removes affection, Then the problem isn’t just one of leadership, it is the concept of God’s Sovereignty. If that is the case you will either cave to the pressure and stop saying NO or you will say NO one too many times and the person who is Christian by name only will leave to find someone that will. In Jesus’ name Christianity isn’t hard it’s impossible, thank God nothing is impossible through Christ.