Believing in things beyond my imagination, fighting for things that bring love into focus and punching above my weight class. Forgiving as instantly as possible and walking on from silly folks who have no idea they are mocking the Maker. Trying to care for folks who most often don’t even realize that they need it. Loving kids, birds, squirrels, goats and donkeys because they know where to get it. Knowing very early that I am meant to pass through this place with very little warm and fuzzy but a treasured set of opportunities to see the impossible done before I leave.

I am not better than anyone, never wanted to be, though did waste a bunch of time trying to master everything to prove to them I was always good enough. Natural insecurity associated with believing that everyone should be given love and realizing that just is not the rules here. What a spectacular use of my time to meet people who seemingly at random needed a kind word, hug or whisper of encouragement. Always getting it wrong when trying to fit in or serve the local master, it’s just outside my structure to do anything because they believe that’s how we measure up.

Life in my cup. Selling nothing. Rarely able to convince anybody of anything especially when they accuse you of being clever enough to do so. Losing the luster of speaking with folks cause they just want to chatter about this or that never really wanting to improve the relationship. Simply marking time until something they want shows up in the availability list. Don’t want to be anything to anybody other than the guy who was there when they needed. I fully comprehend that desire to pass between dimensions at will or just blend into surroundings as it was always the only power I ever really personally obtained. Thank God He showed me how to give that all up.

Trying real hard not to shout above the misery and braggadocio as folks are not taking seriously that God said we need to be prepared. The only time that makes sense is before an event, after it is simply regretful. Never was anyone’s cup of tea or soul mate, just someone solid enough and barely entertaining enough to keep them distracted from checking their watches for the buses arrival. What is faith if we don’t respect it enough to apply all that we are to see it grow by walking? Don’t know how success looks, but I think of it akin to chopping wood. You know there is enough when you’re done chopping.

Can’t tell anyone what is right for them, but that doesn’t mean I won’t sound the trumpet as their enemies come calling. Service has never promised good treatment it really is about getting someone else what they are seeking. I read the Word and see a world that resembles very closely the moments we’ve entered into. In a scarcity sense everybody knows as well but they seem to mention it in passing, not lifting, packing, gathering or disciplining as if the last day might be this one.

Being thankful for everything is the greatest stretch of the expectations I hold dearly close. Things don’t often align with the plans I pondered quietly, but it is even harder to believe that they always turn out better. That’s the thing that makes this impossible thing, easy. I don’t want much anymore. Not that hope has been abandoned, but the trust in my own imagination has somehow gotten so much smaller than I remember. Don’t need to wow the world, I would be fine with a dog that I know I can always impress or sponsor. God is more than enough for me. I truly learned that when I let go of trying to get everyone else to realize how much I love them.