Bearing fruit does not include the worldly evaluation of how I spoke, how I said the words or how short I fell from your or my expectation. It is looking like Christ, not out of some master planned effort but through the Spirit of God Almighty having provided the seeds, fertilization and blossoms of fruit through the Branch of Jesus. I did not do well because I fell short of those things you needed to approve my performance. I did not do well because my connection to Christ either was interrupted, unhealthy or leveraged by His disapproval of my pursuits.

I was born again to look like Christ. Why then would I not look like Him? This is such an elementary Christian question that it boggles the mind we do not ask it of ourselves each day. Why am I not bearing the fruits of the indwelling of Christ’s Spirit? I believe we as a body avoid this question because we cannot bear the answer we inevitably receive. Three apparent explanations: I don’t know Christ in which case I do not possess the Spirit to bear fruit, or my actions are outside of His Will and therefore He is not bearing fruits through me or worse yet I have decided that I do not need to bear fruit for my own intended works are sufficient.

Man and woman are brought together for a union so powerful that God ordains it not be broken except by bond of death. Therefore, any union pursued for the sake of personal/emotional/financial/sexual fulfillment will always be outside of God’s Will, for absent that anointing and the commitment to go until death parts you there will never be sufficient salve to heal wounds and bear ample fruits. These not being of sufficiency or absent immediately force believers to face, avoid or accept the fact that the union is outside of God’s Will. It is a difficult and unpleasant truth to acknowledge however every believer needs admit and accept the facts making steps to rectify the position or depart out of in-congruence.

The pain created in this mature observation/action is always unpleasant, reflecting the importance of a vow before God. However, this may be faced in joy as a perfect indication of the consistency of pursuit of a particular marriage. In fact, if we as the Body were to use this measure to determine all things appropriate we would rapidly mature and avoid those situations that will not bear fruit when pursued. We must also understand that God will use all things to the good for those who love Him and walk according to His purpose. So, when we make poor or decisions that may be viewed as emotional when they crash as they must God will use it for good meeting the qualifying criteria.

It really therefore doesn’t matter how much I love you except as God provides that enduring Love through Spirit to lay down my life for the mate God has given me. No amount of self-help psychology or participative effort will ever match that unending provision of Spirit for an ordained marriage. Conversely no amount of attempted respect or reverence offered a man will be sufficient if not born of the representative union of a believer for God in the Spirit. We will give people either what we are capable of producing or we will give them the unending fulfillment of God’s Love found through Spirit. When approved by God I should have infinite love for my mate and the patience to find it each time the trials are beyond my own personal tolerance.

This is a hard truth for those like me who would love to find a good mate in this lifetime. The plateau it reveals is that I have either yet to meet her or that my own Spiritual Union with Christ is somehow absent. When connected to the Spirit I will bear the Fruits of the Spirit. So if those Fruits are evident in my life alone and not in any relationship I hope will bless it is painfully clear that I am to remain alone in God’s Will for my life. I will not discount that I have already found her or remain in waiting, but it does make clear that fruitless relationships ought be avoided as my own creation. If I have met her and there was no fruit and I was doing things that were inconsistent with God’s Will, until we are both within God’s ordained commands for a marriage that fruit will evade our production.

The secret has always been being in God’s Will as Jesus said, “ Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven”. If I am not doing the Father’s Will how may I ever rationally expect that a marriage I am trying to shoulder will ever bear fruits consistent with God’s Will? For it never will. They have failed from the outset when I determined to depart from what I knew was God’s Good and Perfect Will and never would have been fruitful without that consistent commitment. That realization though painful is the truth that sets us each free from our irrational pursuits and expectation in unions that are never going to bear His Fruits. No amount of effort, self-help or bargaining would ever make it any different. In His name on this wonderful day that He gave us. Jesus Lives.