Knowing. The heart is wicked and seeks to lead astray each man believing it controlled or captured. In desperation of my own regard I find the folly filled pursuit of doing something to retard the worry or fear that steals the heart’s attention. There are no self efforts that will stem this tide and decay. The only resolution seems beyond human capacity of standing ever so quiet in rest, admonishing the heart, head and ears to be strictly attentive for the voice of God’s direction.

Romantic love, clever retort, castles assailed or discussion fail in the midst of faith trial. My planning, effort or resolve mount to naught against the storms that quench my heart. All at once I long for the fulfillment of those imaginary longings of self actualization all the while being whispered to by Spirit, Be Still and Know that I am God. When action taken seems the proper pursuit I require elevation beyond my own capacities. Lest I interfere with God’s intention I must beg Him to give me that will to stand my ground in silence and repose.

There are no answers but to remain in rest, fully dependent upon God’s next move in my reformation. Running faster, seeking exit or some manner of deliverance beyond the Will of God deprives me of the Fruit surpassing my temporary journey’s. Seeking tasks, roads and power beyond my own the desire to answer the urgings of this moment must be relegated to those things held at arm’s distance from chest and ear. Trust is only demonstrated in the faithful, supernatural ability to wait upon God’s Answer, regardless the appetizing list of potential human provided solution.

This is excruciatingly freeing from the repetitive machinations of me. To do something different you must do just that. Thus the pursuit of some measure of relief from burden, trial or test is perpetual misunderstanding. Time will march, regardless of my action. There is only one beyond its effect. My quest is to remain at rest for as long as that is required that I may see the miracles and mysteries God has in store for my present and future. After all, having eschewed the objectives and self outcomes for whatever God shall bring demands that I muster the talent of remaining in neutral as He paves the way to victory, challenge or reward.