Nothing new Kalamazoo, but there are few that I have yet to go through. In a straight forward point of view, I must continue until seeing the blue of skies under which I will review each and every clue and try to pursue to renew all that is due when I have gone through the cue so precious moments few to impart and imbue these Wonderful Words to creatures anew.

Some times your heart is so full of joy and hope that it nearly bursts as an old skin, but this new wine sometimes bitter still reminds me of the road that I am privileged to walk. Stamping on reason and looking for odd adage to make hope from the rhyme, in time I am certain that the revelation will make sense of my discouragement. It is not wrong to be sad for goodness lost and reason found that confound each other to meet in the middle with no joy or pain but resolve in the knowledge that the right thing often hurts. Learning is a path not an instant and the greatest understanding that I have gathered in my walk is that giving to God always produces the finest outcome.

I do not always claim to know what is right but when queried I most often reflect that the right thing would have cost the most personal coin so I chose to invest in something cheaper. Less skin in the game does not mean that things will turn our better in fact the chips in the pot reflect faith, intention and willingness to believe upon something beyond self. My clumsiness often remembered in my elder state I am much less willing to sit out then I am to gamble upon the King, knowing in surety that it was never me who could muster the resolve or solve the dilemma before me.

Sorry, is not the appropriate word for others having made decisions that impact me, hurt me, enrich me or challenge my thought, heart or mirth. I am grateful for each and every soul that enters my fray, with intent to emasculate, entertain, teach train or befriend. For in the end only those things which God allows are the endings I shall reread in my remembrance at journey’s finished. I want this and wish for that and wear a hat to portray what I couldn’t otherwise say to bolster my courage and make clear the position I may have hidden. But honor brought to God may only be achieved in my suffering to maturity in the trials set before me. Losing this person or that source of kindness because I stood for what is right, though painful and unpleasant now shall deliver the largest transformation of Spirit.

Though I know you must leave and have decided to do so having constructed the charade of demonization necessary to exculpate yourself from responsibility. I know that it is your wound forcing you to hurt someone else to protect yourself from introspection. Tragedy is that the lesson will be learned and seeking to end one relationship to avoid the pain of learning it will only bring you to the next character or circumstance God delivers that you at some point may be healed. And this character may be less gentle than me. I will not run from this pain but embrace it as the agent of change and catalyst for growth I know that it will become. For the moment the sadness simply conveys the importance of the kinship. I cannot be what anyone wishes for me to become to suit their wound for that is the process that turns humans into cardboard cutouts and leaves the threatening wound promising you hope in reprobate thinking. I take truth no matter the pain it brings for only in the medicine does healing lie.