Lord I know you forgive me for making a mess of things. Just when you’ve pulled from the muck and mire, I find myself sliding down the roof upon which you safely placed me. Must I remain helpless at all times or is there some hope that I will become a man with his stuff all covered and aligned that conveys a sense of order? There it is my goal somehow includes being seen in a favorable manner by that group of critics I desperately hope to please. Father forgive me and remove this need for approval from my sensibilities, for I truly look to you alone for my position and measure of performance. I think it has something to do with my desire to be loved by them Lord, in that if I tell them what they don’t want to hear they tend to move away, which is clear indications that they have somehow been wronged. Lord let me remember that You are speaking to them and if they are avoiding me that it may be because you have either convicted them through me or have directed them onward, after our interaction produced what you needed in them. I must say Lord that it gets really old losing people, but I guess that is the price of being a Johnny Appleseed persona. The road and meeting as many people as possible to plant as many seeds as possible is perhaps the overwhelming objective that requires this lack of roots and constantly changing cadre of wonderful faces. Father forgive me but you know my desires are simple for a basic home, a loving Family and some measure of peaceful productivity. I know I have left that behind Lord for the sake of Kingdom Work. Can you please perhaps transform me that I have forgotten that internal desire that I might be peaceful in my choices?

The achievement man is passed. The accolade man has forfeited his awards and medals. I do not yearn for them Lord, but I do miss the good people, the family around me. I know that your Word says that you will provide for all of my needs according to your riches and glory in Christ Jesus. Lord could that perhaps include some family with whom to do this work. Perhaps Lord I am too terse, too harsh or bluntly true. Forgive me Father for ever injecting my perspective or force into the mix. Your Word alone is all that matters, let me never stray one syllable from its perfection, purpose and intent for those whom you love.  Please let me be a conduit not a translator of your Purpose, remembering that Your Almighty Hand crafted all these, even the ones with whom I have conflict. They should get nothing but my love.  Please forgive me for avoiding argument whenever possible as I have found for me this never serves Your Good Will only my own egoistic tendency. Lord if you wish for me to stand and argue the matter I most certainly will but I do thank you for taking away that desire to compete. Father, I know that all good things come from heaven above and I pray that You shower these people with your blessings of joy and hope, keeping them safe and sheltered from your enemies whenever possible. If they be in harm’s way I pray that they remember that the enemy may never penetrate the Full Armor of God and if they dawn it they shall stand against all the fiery darts and enemy assault, arising to victory at the emergence of your IMMINENT Glorious Appearing.  In Jesus’ name I pray.