I wanted to do so much for you Lord, that when I am old I may remember the things I accomplished.  I wanted to bring my family to Your Throne, humbled in heart and mind, craving Your Word, Your Love.  I wanted to take them by storm, wow them with my deep thinking, nurturing their creativity and watching them flourish.  I had all these ideas and I waited on you, telling everyone of the glorious things I would do for You, but You never lit the fuse.  I needed cash to get my idea off the ground, but everyone resisted busting out their wallets.  Now I just ridicule them as being insufficient Christians, having not seen the wisdom in my quest to please God and rescue humanity.  I want to save the world, if only they will listen to my eloquence.  The problem with what I wanted to do is that only my will is truly served when each of my sentences begins with “I”.

How does the Lord wish to use me as a vessel for “His” Good Will?  That should be the beginning of each sentence I utter regarding any true purpose or service for the Lord our God.  If I keep praying for something and He continues to say no or just makes me wait then does it make sense to logically assert my own will in the gap, hoping to somehow bring glory to God.  Certainly He will use all things to the greatest good of His unfolding plan, even though I am unabashedly serving, self.  Have I searched the scripture and gone to the Lord through prayer thoroughly understanding His Will for my efforts or patience?  I say patience because, often in our quest for guidance, we are instructed to stand still and wait upon the Lord.  This appears to be the single hardest discipline for each Christian to accept, tolerate and then fully comprehend.  Patience, must like mature faith requires indwelling and movement of the Holy Spirit, thus it is something beyond our own ability.  We then must, “put aside” ourselves and mimic Christ’s behavior, not our own.  How then would going and taking actions, based on our own understanding begin this process of learning patience?  How does “I” at the beginning of each sentence in any way reflect an inclination to walk according to God’s Will for my life?

Lord lead us, provide for us, give us strength, courage and love when it comes to fulfillment of Your Will.  Keep us from self serving temptation.  Let us not go astray by hearing noisier voices then Your Peaceful, Quiet Wisdom.  Praise God, do His Will alone.  In Jesus Name.