The experience was not real.  It was only just emotion.  Where was the obedience, honest faith or true devotion?  The notion of Almighty God intrigued even such as me.  I came to church expecting that I’d get a chance to see.  They stood and they sang, some even shout, I couldn’t understand what their tears were all about.  They seemed to feed on music and some upon the mood and I must admit it was nice to have some coffee and free food.  When the clock hit one passed noon they raced for the front door, packed up all the kids, blessed themselves, and pushed the pedal to the floor.  I wept for myself in a puddle of despair and now I was indifferent that they didn’t seem to care.  My quest to meet Creator, God ended there that day.  If he had not come after me I would have never found the way.

Churches doing only what they think is right, instead of keeping to His  Unchanging Word.  The things they do in public sight somehow seem quite absurd.  Forgiveness without repentance lives remaining bound to sin.  How could Jesus ever leave if you had never invited Him in?  I prayed and hoped that they would see the error of their ways.  But I truly think that they will face the wrath in the end of days.  That hurts me so as I look inside wondering what I could have done.  I tried and tried until the point I cried from dawn to setting sun.  But He has won though I have lost in my weakness as a man.  Because their tribulation sainthood had always been His plan.  Forgive me Lord for what I’ve done and more for what I have not.  I should have respected fully the blood with which I was bought.

So maybe little churches with Pastors old and gray are paid with grace and mercy instead of worldly pay.  They preach the Sword of Freedom, the double edged blade and the Word, the Light, My Jesus who spoke and we were made.  I pray for God’s extended mercy while people figure out that He is coming with a trumpet followed by a Mighty shout.  At that moment when they witness we have gone away, they’ll remember their indifference to everything we say.  I pray that God forgives them as they cry out in the night and He shields and protects from destruction as the world loses its last fight.

Praise God in all his glory with everything I’ve got may He remember to forgive me for all that I forgot.  Jesus, Holy Jesus, nothing but my praise, every moment in Your presence never ceases to amaze.